Indecisive Thoughts







January 8, 2002
You know, if you've kept a journal of your life... or if sumbody's kept a journal and you've been mentioned quite often in that journal... then you read it several years later... you'll realize how different everything is... Not only your personality, but your friends, your mindset, your situations, your goals, everything...

even what you talk bout with your best friend is different. It's like you're a completely different person...

Could it be because that you just happened to change through the years? or maybe you've matured... or have your surroundings and your trials changed you? Whatever it must be... it kind of makes you wonder.."Is there nothing left of the old me?..am I a completely differnt person?" I mean... if everything and everybody has changed...have you changed so much that U're not the person you used to be? Is change inevitable? Can you do everything in your power to stay the person you are until you die? If not...can you change back or can you change things back to how they were?

Can u get back what you had with somebody?? Or are U forever going to have to live with the fact that you will never be the person you were or have the same relationship you once had....

anyways.... sorry if this is all over the place... just whole bunch of thoughts

December 18, 2001
Merry Christmas...is that the wrong thing to say now adays? apparently it is. businesses, companies and skools can't even say Merry Christmas without sumbody getting fired for it. Is society these days sooo up tight that people can't even say something like Merry Christmas without being chewed out? Okay sure, pplz have other religions and stuff but why are they so offended. I mean considering that North America was colonized by Protestant and Catholic countries don't you think that Merry Christmas should be allowed? but no...these pplz who take offence are sooooo offended they can't even have 2 words said to them that have sumthing to do with a different religion. Wut's gonna be next? no more christmas decorations just because some people are offened. and then in american they're going to take off the phrase "in God we trust" off their bills because not all people believe in God? if these people are so offended then they shouldn't get any christmas sale prices that the rest of us get. or any special treatment due to christmas spirit because they have a different religion. It will be a sad sad day in the world when one christmas there isn't any christmas decorations and EVERYTHING that has to do with religion is kept all hush hush. I mean wut the hell is this!? sure there's still free speech and it's encouraged...until it offends a group of people. "first burn books, next burn the people.." that was said by a dictator...our views and religions are the books and by silencing these "books" it is like taking the first step of that plan. If U're offended by this I do not apologize because U CANNOT burn THIS book....

November 4, 2001
I'm in Grade 11 and yet I still think skool sux. I dont' think I'll ever get rid of this mentality. Skool has interfered in my life so much lately. First I dont' get a job cuz they need a day time person and cuz I'm at skool I don't get da job. Then cuz of skool I have to use my brain and grrr.. stupid skool. oh well. only like 1.5 years more to go b4 I get out of GP(Guildford Park).

July 5, 2001
Wow it seems like forever since I last put up a thought. Hmmm....loox like I wuz wrong...My parents R letting me get my L this year. Ain't that great? SOon Enuf I'll have my N. this harsh rox.

June 25, 2001
Skool is finally over!!! I didn't get straight A's so I prolly won't be driving this year but wutever. Now that it's summer I can totally blow my time working on my pages or doing absolutely nothing. Sweet!!!! I'm gonna try to learn some javascript and utilize my 3d Studio Max and finally organize my site and stuff tho. aish. So boring now adays. well I'm out.

June 10, 2001
Death is a reality of life. It gets us thinking, not only about the love one lost but about the love ones we'll lose and our own death. Whoah, it seems like forever since the last time I wrote sumthing in here. hmmm...lets see. I have like a couple finals. Science final, Html class final and a social studies final project. I dunno about info tech though. We might be having a final though. I can't wait for skool to be over! Oh ya one more thing...Colorado won!!!! How could pplz think that they wouldn't? sheesh. Lakers R gonna win!!!!

May 20, 2001
Skool has made me almost completely thotless now. Damn skool. ehhe. I'm out.

May 13, 2001
I'm gettin old. 16...and I still can't drive!!! That sux and I can't complain about it cause my parents just spent like $450 on my new glasses. Damn the MP3 Player I wanted doesn't even kost that much. Sheesh!!! Damn titanium crap. Neways...L.A. all the way!!!! Want L.A. Lakers to win championships this year. Sure Kobe is soo cocky now but her he's good enuf he can be. Did I mention I hate skool?? dunno where that came frum...just thought I would point that out. Well I'm all out of thoughts now.

May 8, 2001
Yay my modem and sound card are working. Ai...rite now I'm trying to convince my parents to get cable modem. argh I hate skool so much. I go back to skool and I'm like so behind and grrr...damn skool. meh whatever, it all sux. hmmm...what else is there?? Nothin I guess...well I'm done ranting.

April 22, 2001
I don't wanna go bakk to skool!! I think my parents R gnna make me go bakk next week...Damn! Meh...have to go bakk eventually...skool is inevidable...hafta go. Hmmm...so wut's new with me???? Still waitin patiently for 3ds max...thats bout it.

April 21, 2001
Now that I have the frameless site up I'll be kept busy for a couple dayz. Y U ask?? Well, because I'll be pondering Y I even put it up in the first place and then I'll take it down. I was bored so I put it up so ya. Aish...need stuff 2 do but hopefully I'll keep myself busy by trying to learn 3d studio max...yay!! Difficult long road but hopefully it'll give me experience with animation and modeling.

April 20, 2001
Don't u love how pain killers take away a tremendous amount of pain?? I do...hehe...I'm not a drugy. The worst part about being gimped is being gimped. Oh well. I'm bored. Gots noffin to do now...aish...snore.

April 19, 2001
Again the Canucks don't show how much they deserved to be in the playoffz. What the hell was that yesterday?? 5-2!!?? I'd rather sell the Canucks than sell the Grizzlies. Argh, that was so pathetic.
okay off of that topic. ai...now that I can't go to skool for a while I'm gonna fall so far behind in my work. Damnit...oh wells, it's only skool. Now I have a lot more time to work on my web site for socials. heheh.


April 17, 2001
Is it just me or are the Canucks pissin U off too? Yes sure we've led all three games but who won in the end? Yes, that's right, Colorado won. What kind of defence lets a team score 2 goals less than 60 seconds apart? Oh ya, and what the heck is the point of drillin sumbody's face into the ice in OVER TIME!!! We would have had a power play too. Although we've done so badly I still have hope that they will win in game 4 and extend the series to 5 games or more. My second thought is, "Y do we keep losing?". Not only losing games but losing teams and events. First it was the Vancouver Voodoo a long time ago, then the symphony of fire, after that the Molson indy, next the Vancouver Grizzlies. It seems the only things we haven't lost are the Canucks, and the BC Lions. At least we still have the Winter Olympix.